BEWARE! Bloggin is Not Safe! (7asbe Allah Wa Ne3m Alwakeel)

I have left the blogsphere for what seemed like a very long time since I was a usual blogger. The reasons were a mixture of work, being busy in life and that the Saudi blogging scene started to seem to me boring and worse and worse while time goes. It was noticed by the kind of posts and the kind of comments. Harassments on blogs and bloggers were just stupid.

I wished I had my identity anonymous, it is not.. But as time go by.. People started knowing me. And bloggers met up and it's not as anonymous as people think, even when were using screen names.

When i came back however -KUZ I LIKE TO WRITE AND I DONT VENT TO MY FRIENDS!- i had problems with getting a good layout.. still looking for one btw. But, i was introduced to a new set of ARABIC BLOGS and no, not the boring old ones, real nice blogs that i got addicted on reading! One was Mashe 9a7 and another was Fouad al Farhan and a couple more

As some of you might know by now, Fouad is now in jail for blogging. IN JAIL!! Jailed for having a point of view, jailed for gathring a bunch of banners for other bloggers to use, for some people who were jailed and he thought were innocent!!!

I pray for him to go back to his family safe and sound, I pray for all the terrorists to bomb themselves in their hideouts and let us live in peace and I pray for the government to give us a lil bit of freedom to speak our opinions! Even if it's just on the internet.

All of This reminds of when Farah (farahs sawaleef blog owner) deleted her blog. People told me that she was actually threatened the same way as Fouad was. And that they got to her father. I never talked to her about this before, kuz I thought it was just a myth. Now I am not so sure!

Click on the pic for the official Free Foaud page.


More on this topic:

• Fouad’s Letter by Saudi Jeans
• Saudi Blogger Fuad Al-Farhan Arrested Again by Rasheed
• Saudi Blogger Fouad Al Farhan Arrested in Jeddah (Global Voices Article)
• Saudi blogger Fouad Al-Farhan arrested by Mahmood

The Amazing World of Colors..

You can not believe how much colors fascinate me. When are beautifully set, they make my day! -talk about one low maintenance chic!-

I've been thinking which colors should go together, since all colors are favs to me, it's hard to make a random dress arrangement color theme, or an interior design idea.

I am not afraid though, as I said, I love colors.. And thank God, in this day and age, it's a fashion to mix and match ;)

UPDATE!

GREEN KITCHEN!!! GREEEEEN KITCHEN =\

I luuuv green, but not in my kitchen :S sheesh, mama should never suggest nothing to my fiance!

Let the Laziness Begin!

yeah, i'm gonna stay at home :D i deserve it after all this hard work.
my mind is set.
i just hope i dont miss my job,

Deja Vous

whoa.. *wiping forehead*

you all know what deja vous means.. you all been through it. what if i told you that my whole day of today was a series of deja vous!!!!

i was thinking of quitting. having a break for a couple of months, then hitting the working scene after i am done with my matters and i am more relaxed. and to TARGET the places where i wana work.

and for all of you who don't work, this is a very tough decision to make! and not for another better job, not for school, no.. to stay at home! -i'm doing my schooling by distance but that doesn't count-

so yeah, i couldn't do it! i chickened out! i need a push. and i have only my hubby to relay on, and i'm starting to think maybe it's too early to relay on him..

Fo0f, over and out. wow, i'm seriously back to blogging!

Lifetime Piling Up (stolen tag :$)

ABOUT YOU!
1. What time is it: 11:33 am
2. Name: Fo0f the great :D
3. Nickname(s): Fo0f, Fo0fah, Fifi, Nuna, Nuni, Nuffy.. the list goes on
4. Where were you born: Riyadh Military Hospital
5. What is your birthdate: April 24, 1984
6. What do you want: sleep?
7. Where do you want to live: California!
8. How many kids do you want: i used to want so little, but now, i want lotsa kids
9. What would you want to name a girl: i'm not giving out the good names!!
10. What would you want to name a boy: same as above
11. You want to get married: guess so

..ARE YOU..
1. Simple or complicated: sooo simple people'd think i'm complicated
2. Gay: no
3. Hardcore: depends

Worst:
1. Time of day: waking up for work.
2. Day of the week: it's always sunday!
3. Color crayon: black, it never is really black!

Today:
1. What are you doing now: dodging work :$
2. Wearing: jeans, sneakers and a tee, but above it all my lovely abaya

Tomorrow:
1. Is: Tuesday
2. Got any plans: i dont plan ahead :P maybe i'll hit the spa/gym. or shopping, most probably tv
3. Goal: to loose seriouse wieght
4. Dislikes about tomorrow: nothing

Favorite:
1. Number: Seven! DUH
2. Song: I believe i can fly - R Kelly
3. Color: Lots

Currently:
1. Missing Someone: no =p
2. Mood: fine
3. Wanting: my headache to go away!

IN THE LAST MONTH, HAVE YOU?
1. Had a boyfriend or girlfriend: no
2. Bought something you didn't need: yes
3. Sang in front of people: i am always singing
4. Been kissed: yes :$
5. Been hugged: yes
6. Felt stupid: i dont recall
7. Got drunk: no
8. Got high: no
9. Danced crazy: i sure did
10. Gotten your hair cut: no
11. Cried: oh, yeah!
12. Lied: everyday! =\

DO YOU PREFER...
1. Sun or moon: both
2. Winter or Fall: Winter akeed, fall's depressing
3. Left or right : right
4. 10 acquaintances or having two best friends: two best friends
5. Sun or rain: rain
6. Vanilla ice cream or chocolate ice cream: vanilla
7. Vodka or Jack: they both stink =p
8. Flowers or candy: flowers
9. Grey or black: black
10. Color or Black and white photos: color
11. Lust or love: love
12. Sunrise or sunset: rise
13. M&Ms or Skittles: Skittles
14. Staying up late or waking up early: waking up early NOT FOR WORK/SCHOOL. or staying late with good company!

LAST PERSON WHO:
1. Slept in a bed beside you: i think i never slept next to anyone unless were traveling i share a bed with one of my sisters. but last time i was sleeping with my sis and 2 of our friends :D we couldnt believe we were sleeping over! haha
2. Saw you cry: khalid my bro
3. Went to the movies with you: my lil sis and older bro
4. You went to the mall with: my sisters and Ally our friend
5. You went to dinner with: my aunt
6. You talked on the phone: Ally
8. Made you laugh: SAMMY!

Have-You-Evers
1. Dated A Best Friend: no
2. Been Arrested: no
3. Been On TV: no
4. Eaten Sushi: all the time :D'
5. Been On A Blind Date: lol, no
6. Been Out Of The Country: yes
7. Been In Love: yes (at least i thought i was)

-6 Things You've Done Today
1: woke up late
2: drank avocado juice for breakfast
3: slept in the car
4: smsed my fiance
5: prepared my monthly report
6: wasted some work time doing this!

-5 Favorite Things (not in any order)
1: music
2: love
3: friends
4: graphics
5: my family

Me and Mr Jones

As happy as i am to have my own place, i know i got to start new habits.. which involves another person in everything :S this is not what i am used to.. okay i don't hide stuff. but i don't necessarily tell ppl abt my life.. that's one of the reasons i got a blog, i know i wana talk.. just not to ppl who actually know me :P
so yeah... i never thought it takes this much time, effort and money to plan a wedding! God bless u daddy for this.

Try to do:
Think of mama as hubby, share everything with her, bore her with my life :P sms her, call her and discuss matters with her :P
Sleep at 10 PM everyday
Start STICKING to a healthy diet
Go to the SPA and enjooy after work for an hr MINIMUM
Go to GYM 3 days a week (do the water exercise at least once a week!)
Think seriously about my job? is it worth it?
ACE MY EXAMS!
Take care of my self more.. dermatologist, laser experts and makeup lessons :P

anything i missed? i think not, any tips are appreciated ;)

Fo0f~

Say Hello to the New Mrs ;)

So.. i'm a woman now? hehe, does that even make sense.. does getting married mean you've converted from (girl) to (woman)? so if u've never wed and ur 40 years of age, ur still a (girl)?? mmm.. interesting how living in saudi arabia effect on my way of thinking =P

okay, i cant believe i'm actually thinking this, but i want a boy.. i want to have 3 boys, and that's it. when i reach 45 years old. i get pregnant again and get a lil girl the we all spoil rotten! yeah i know it's so weird how one day i'm thinking i dont wana have kids, next day thinking about names !!there's a story behind everything with me.. so here goes;

i met this extraordinary woman in thailand this year, she's moms age. but she's so lively.. she works in the same teaching sector as mama. she has a successful engineer husband (ahem, dad!), and BAM they graduated from the same state uni that my parents graduated from, just a couple of years later!! how bazar is that!

this woman was so intelligent and had her own thoughts.. it was surprising to me as i always thought these women who were involved in the teaching sector were close-minded women who dont think for themselves.. (mom and her friends effected that way of thinking sadly) i met the woman in a shopping mall in bangkok.. we shopped together!!!! mom never told me this would look nice on me, what to get and what not! sheesh!! i think i got issues!! hehe..

we then met with her hubby, who was nice enough to walk around the mall with us and sit in each shop waiting for us to finish :P and her 3 boys (yeah u got me, i want to be something like her!) she was successful and interesting and fun and had her on head with her own thoughts!!!

my mom is pretty open minded and intellectual and well touted. but once she hit home, she started to become a copy of every middle aged woman in saudi.. she started copying wht her peers do and think. and i'm kinda embarrassed i'm saying this. i actually told her the other day, mom please when with anyone, talk about ur views on the community.. ur dreams, ur past and future.. ur thoughts on life.. dont just sit around talking about wht ur bros and sisters do in life (jobs), or asking question like who are u married to, who's ur uncles and how many kids do u have!! makes u sound STUPID when it's all u can think of in a convo..

can u tell i'm mad at her? it seems like i always am!

when my friends say their moms their friend, i used to wonder whats wrong with me!!! now i know it's whats wrong with momzy.. no wonder i got issues, *rolling eyes*

Airhead Anyone?

I been very very very busy lately. and it's not kuz i should be busy, or that i have actually a lot to do. but it's more me trying to dodge thinking about some stuff that are not very pleasant to me, which i know my brains drooling around at the mo'.

so been to parties this last couple of weeks. danced like crazy there and home in front of concerts on video! been shopping for junk i never thought i needed, and for other stuff i never thought I'd go out to shop for.

called and got to know EVERY make up artist and hair stylist in Riyadh! photographers, dress makers! designers! cater service! flower shop!! and i heard all the Arabic songs i wana hear for a year!!!

oh, yeah, did i mention that i also broke a nail?

Why Would You Think I'd Change?

It's interesting how people think ur gonna change drastically just because ur moving to a new city, ur starting a new job, u've met other people or.. You're getting married.

i'll still go to the same place i work at everyday, i'll complain about the same systems and long work hrs. i'll curse the transportation system, i'll have my daily junk food lunches and wonder when will i start eating healthy. i'll still listen to my Ipod, go all the way to the supermarket just to get olives and cheese.. i'll still enjoy drinking Lipton's Ice Tea.. Getting together doing random stuff with my friends on Wednesdays, sleeping on the couch in front of TV watching my fav sitcoms..

why would mom ask me to go with her to her med aged cousins weekly gathering!! Oh yeah, so it's 3eed! They still need to get something in common with me for me to hang around them..

Fo0f's Having Second Thoughts

you were nice, looked okay. had a good future, a nice view of where u gonna be. came from a good family, and had great sisters.

i met with u and u were.. sweet for a first meet.

i liked, and i thought, well Fo0f, it's time. there's no reason to say no. so i said yes :)

now, while things show more and more clearer, i realised. all the things i thought i didnt like are showing, i don't think they are enough reasons, but still. i cant help it. i can't sleep at night. and when i do sleep, i get nightmares! i wake up frightened! is that right?

i am so torn in the middle, between what people think, and wht he thinks, and wht my parents think.. yeah, no one even asked what i thought. i know one thing. Mr T is so happy i'm leaving.

what's happening. i dont know. what will happen? it wont be long and i'll know everything.

Happy happy :D

i got accepted!! total euphoria!!
yeah well, i kinda am happy not just because i got accepted. because i did after i throw the acceptence in thier faces and thinkin i was better than that.. then, realising i should take that offer that i always wanted :S but after the deadline passed!!

i didnt know my uncles in jeddah would be helpful. but i gotta admit, i luv uncle 9agar and wont forget his help! alsoo euphoria ;) luv u girl =X

to be totally honest; i am also happy kuz i'm watchin my fav show, numb3rs :D

The Kingdom

i been wondering why this movie didn't come out on April as promised. lol, they even changed the poster. this is something Hollywood should've done a long time ago, bring a reliable person as a consultant on the Arabs/Saudis.

i didn't see the movie yet (obviously) but now, i'm actually more interested to see it.

click here to read the interview with ahmed albrahim.

So.. The foof is back.. (we know already, get over it! :S) Random post

i cant believe i left this place, this was my safe spot! My so called haven. so yeah, i'm so dumping facebook *hmmmf*

i was really bummed today when i discovered i missed juventus second game back in seria A. Our ART subscription sucks! i heard Jazirah sport cost about 30 riyals a year? i bet Riyad has it *resentful of the idea of tv we need to pay for!*

so yeah, the game had 3 penalties against juve which is soo unheard of, and yet, they won! i cant believe how anyone can downgrade the best soccer team in the world. YES I SAID IN THE WORLD.

so nxt game is on 23rd. by that time i'd probably already forgot :P and i might miss it (yeah, right). i'm so into the italian league again. i so hope this aint the last season for del piero and buffon.. that might actually hurt me :(

today i'm being challenged on this dawre yabani game on PS2 which i always resented. you think i'm gonna win?? i'm playing Brazil that tells you i'm desperate to win, i usually choose Italia or saudia ;)

my new layout is in Itachi's hands, but since his new layout aint that kewl =P i guess this will do for a looong time.. dont get me wrong, i'm still searching for a "phunky" one ;)

you cant believe how much i'm enjoying browsing new blogs.. it's like i just started bloggin :D

oh yeah, we got DSL at last!! Now that's great news or wht ;) please do tell if u know of a website which broadcasts italian league football games.

Whoever has a decent speed internet, check these out, REAL funny:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cbh4G1OyCJo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CyV3e7au6Fc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hdlvikoNCSs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icWhfeVojXk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fIuwrscaP4k

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SAn-LqduGvc

Swer tagged the Fo0f,

So, this sweet blogger tagged me while i was in my coding dilemma.. i miss these tags.. so thanks Swer ;)

Eight facts about me that no one knows:

1- i got problems sleeping for a long time now, the only 2 solutions i came up with are, to have a full active day so i come back home so tired i go right to sleep, or to watch any kind of series on my laptop till literally fall sleep :P

2- i luv wearing flats, the only thing that makes me buy and wear heels is that i am short, and i look a LOT younger than my real age.

3- i luv my family so much, i had a huge fight with my middle bro, and 2 hrs later we were out shopping, he called me yesterday telling me i should visit him and i was so touched my eyes teared up.

4- i always thought i was getting married this year. (although i was not engaged nor involved with no one). i still believe i will.

5- people always underestimate my power, they think i'm sweet cute lil noufa, little that they know; sweet lil noufa can stand up for herself ;)

6- i miss seeing dad. vacation was heaven, i used to see him everyday. i honestly wish we can work together, maybe i should work on that!

7- i am a freakishly fast typer, it actually scares people in my office.

8- i started out blogging to get a lot of stuff out of my head, and instead i found out a lot about myself through it

Tagging EIGHT ppl! wow, let me remember old bloggers :P Rimyoleta, Fishy, Moods, Itachi, missy, Euphoria, lipstickwahabi, taqwa.. and yeah i know most of them are already tagged :P whtever.

Bleh.. This will do for the mo' -i know it sounded stupid :P

So yeah, i got a LOT of good ayouts, but no comment code, and adding it screwed up the whole code, so.. Itachi was kind enough to help but .. madre.. he got busy :P

so this will do.. this week was great.. bring more details soon.

my friends today totally bailed on me they went out without me and they told me theyre busy later, so later, they were still out, and i got no ride now :S the bastards :P i'll kick thier asses tomorrow at work!

soooo, wht did i miss?

Fo0f~

Testing..

Digging the new layout anyone?
i know i need to personlise it more before i say this is it.

I'm back! big time!!

so, i missed my blog. period!

i'm gonna work on it again, new layout, new chatty box, new bloggers links!! i seen lotsa new bloggers who got it goin on.. so yeah, i'm back!

:D

Bleh.

Bleh..

This blog has come and gone, went on and off, seen happy times and not so happy times, met through ppl and got to know ppl, whom both i hate, luv, adore, respect and resent.. i NEVER thought blogging would have had an effect on my life. After all. I started blogging as a way to vent :)

As i come back today, after a long breakup with my blog, to complain, i realise i owed my blog too much. i wouldnt have become who i am without it. being good or bad, is not up to me to decided, but i know this much, i like myself much much more now. i've really learned.

so yesterday was crappy, yeah thats all i'm gonna say for the time being. blogging aint safe anymore, and ya'll know wht i mean..

Again, bleh.

Off!

i'm fed up, being at work and not doing anything sucks!!
i made my mind, i'm bringing my PSP tomorrow!!

10 things I realized lately.

1. Worrying or thinking about something that already happened is just a waste of time.
2. I CAN do anything.
3. I can not just sit and do NOTHING! (current status @ work)*
4. I'm a techy geek whether I like it or not! I actually miss my glasses.
5. I can NOT live properly without working out.
6. My face tells you everything about me! =\
7. I NEED a car!
8. I am very loyal to my bank (I am NOT being sarcastic =\)
9. I CAN cope with my life with less sleep.
10. I miss you :$
    
    *I'm actually writing this from work!!
    
    ~Over and out.
    
    Ps. To taqo, I am in the process of getting a new layout 8)~

Cleaning Out My Closet

Wow. as I re-read our convos.. This one last time, before I clean my PC from the dust.. I go through ur words and I remember the pain! The fear! The confusion!! The hurt!! How I put up with all ur stupid lies! With ur crazy ideas! How I made up excuses for you to people, when I didn't believe them but thought I should protect you!

And now, as I read again, I just feel... numb.

~Lol, someone tells me ur gay!! LMAO.

I'm a Granny!!! Well, I Do Feel Like One!!!

My sisters cat had babies!!
I feel so...... motherly somehow!!

Oh my, she went through labor pain 8( And now baby Tiger is a lil mother!!

Awwww
:3

(Someone should shut me up already!)

New Type of Terrorism.. Hey, I'm Just Quoting Here ;)

They already did that before to my old TaurusChic blog! What can I say; at least they're keeping themselves busy.

Mixed feeling I got when I saw "Oil Cell" members on TV talk about how they wanted to blast the oil fields city of Ebqiq in Eastern province. I am happy they got caught. But it is scary how they already got busy schedules with lotsa activities.

I had a male relative who used to think that Al Qaida was actually doing Muslims a favor, and making "us" "powerful" and "respected", and this way "amreeka" –USA- will "fear us".
After a close relative died in al washam bombing 2 years ago, he stopped thinking that way.

7asbe allah 3alihom, allah yj3al 7eelhom beenhom.

When I was in school, one of my friend's cell phone was damaged and when she took it to be fixed, they gave her a temp phone to use. This phone had a recording of an above 18 girl to guy convo. She let me and another friend hear it, the other friend told her to tell the girls she actually recorded that to a girl who was not good with her, I asked wth should she claim to that, and she replied to make the girls scared of you, therefore, respect you!!!!

That ass. Her lies got her to lotsa trouble.

Ps. if you think you are creative in Arabic writing, maybe you should check out that site ;)

End of post.

Hans,
You come up to me in my own blog and judge me and give me advise on how to spend my time and what to do, then u act as if ur a real nice person. Honestly, I don’t believe in nice people anymore, so whatever u wana say, say it already, or just shut up ;)

So.. KSU is Stupid..?

This girl I met got a double major in KSU!!! She actually played the system!! FARTHEADS!

Ps. to Hans, how can I help u :)

Hmmm, I kinda did miss it!

Well. I am back to being the techy chica..

• I am reading VBA books to refresh my mind.
• Fixing my aunts printer and making her some high resolution picture files.
• Adding additional RAM to my Laptop.
• Fixing my bros MP3 player (Heck, I remembered, where the heck is my Ipod!!)
• DLing software for my new cell phone (whaaat, this also counts!)
• Searching for a new layout. (HELP!)

So, I am working with this really nice guy, who is a very Shiite. He's from Gatif, got a million bros and sisters...etc. But all in all, he's a great dude! Smart, well educated and a team player, I can't get over why ppl assume we don't get along.

I remembered when I was in my old Syrian mob department, I was supposed to check some people to work with us, and I got this CV for this young fellow who's a fresh grad. I showed my supervisor, he looked at the address, read "Gatif" out loud and said, "ma nbeeh!!" -we don't want him- I was like, that's not a reason! He laughed and left me speechless!

I might "hate" Syrians, Egypt, Cults, Clumsy people! But I would never base something like that on not choosing a guy for a job =\

Shit, I feel like I can't write well anymore!
I desperately need to be hitting the GYM!

New weekend, new life, new me..

So, I started becoming more and more careless.. And this is so opposite of me, I'd like to thank a new friend who made me look at life differently.. Life is so much better and easier this way :)

My grandpa is recovering in the hospital after his open heart op, and my aunt is back to the hospital for more chemo. Rabe arf3 3anhom o 3afeehom.

I Guess.. I Never Hated You

Speechless..
Lotsa events..
I guess writing aint gonna give you the feeling!

I never judged..Seriousely.. NEVER!

Yeah well..
I guess respecting the pasts u had is what keeps u going :)

There's a Pirates of the Caribbean PSP Game??!!!

I'm back. I'm back to ranting. I'm not paying 9$ a year for my domain whom all my family and friends know about anymore!! This is better.

I had a great costume party the other day!! I actually DJed that gig, Stereo Laptop, wiring, and big speakers!! It's was kool!!

I wana list the people who most attracted attention with thier outfits:

• Mummy
• Devil lady
• Bee!!
• Goth Angel
• Jack Sparrow :P
• Hawaiian Chica (I thought Malibu Barbie, but whatever:P)
• Hood Nigga
• Arabian Dancer (we got 3 of those!)
• Japanese lady!!
• Hooker
• School girl
• Miss World :P
• Faronic Lady
• Lady from the 18th century
• Gothic chic
• Cult member
• Harry Potter!!
• FBI Agent

Lotsa other girls wore 50's style dresses, and a couple of my sis friends came wearing jeans :@

Anyhoo, WOW!! I realized hosting parties aint easy! But definitely FUN!!!

So, that's an activity to do in boring Riyadh ;)

Time's Running Up

Wow, I'm almost 23 and I am OH SO BORED, I look at older people in my family and work and wonder how could they put up with life, it's boring. Or is it just me? I wonder.

So, I been trying out new habits, in which might not be right, but excuse my boredom, I need to be entertained :P Here are the major ones;

• Started eating the food I hated, and stopped eating the food I liked.
• Getting in touch with REALLY OLD friends!
• Watching old Arabic cartoons on my DVD player (3adnan wa lina and robbin hood)
• Reading the blogs I hated to read.
• Plan a costume party!
• Play more on my PSP. I need more games!
• If I liked something, go for it right away! (Careful, this might result financial problems)
• I'm looking for friends in Thailand, yeah, just for the sake of it!
• Really listen when my sisters talk to me about school or co-op.
• Facebook is for fun only. The bikini shots have to go down!
• Imagin I'm flying off to Hong Kong & checking out hot spots and make reservations =D
• Buy a car! Thank God for lease programs ;)
• Cutting off TV time. And less internet hours!

Regarding blog world, I'm interviewing 3zayez as soon as I get the time and energy. Need some help from Ash to do some polls about the blogs for the bloggers group. And Taqwa to write the questions~!

Blah

i'm bored.

I'm Famouse.. Well, Sorta :P

Arab Summit now in Riyadh, everything is saying welcome, we got flags everywhere, we got more security, we got rush-free-streets!! Ahhh, I'm gonna miss it on my way to work on Saturday!

Well, the other day I got an email from someone asking to post my Flickr pix of Riyadh!! Woohooo, turns out I am a good photographer after all :P

Check "ME" out here :D and here, and here !!

~Ciao

Weekends Over Already!! 8(

So, I been watching a lot of One Tree Hill lately, I always thought that was a stupid high school kids kinda show, like Dawson's Creek, and that I hated.. Turns out, things are not as they seem. It is actually a good show. It tells you a lot about family, friends, love, and what does it cost you to go on pursuing dreams. I never thought this show would make me think about life. Analyze a lot. It's a nice show, and I am so wanting season three right now.

My favorite One Tree Hill quote at the moment:
"Maybe you're taking a step back as a basketball player, but you're taking 2 steps forward as a man" -Coach Whitey

Ps. I hate Windows Live! Looks too boxy to like!!

Pss. UMEE; I NEED MY ROOM KEYS!! WALA I HATE THIS NO PRIVACY WHAT SO EVER!!!!!

"They Haunt Her by a Whisper.. A Chill Comes Over Me.."

I grew up to respect all sorts of authority. God, the King, cops, Mom and Dad, grandparents, uncles and aunts, other parents, until a certain age; maids, school teachers, school consular, teachers assistants and the list goes on.

See, when I was little I never question authority, it was correct that they are always right! And I just have to do what they say, take whatever advises they offer, "assuming" they always wanted the best for me. I was a kid, naive, I trusted ANY sort of authority.

Now, as I completed over two years of working in the banking sector in Saudi Arabia. My path crossed a lot* of bad people, in authority places. And being all grown up and getting to know that not everyone will have the best intentions and can't do anything about it, really hurts!

Sometimes, I think, maybe I am what dad says, a spoiled child who can not cope with the pressure of work. And that's why I choose to stay, and not be called a quitter, or I did, for as long as I could, and believe me, two years of putting up with that 10 hrs a day is not an easy job.

Today, I came to what I think I might regret, but knowing that I usually don't regret the stuff I do, gives me strength to go forward. I am stepping up; I am gonna say something about it. And whatever happens later, I got nothing to loose!

May God give me more strength to do this ASAP.

Have a pleasant weekend everyone!

* I usually say millions, as a form of assertion (9ee'3at mobala'3ah), which I came to understand people don't really appreciate. Plus, I don't really know if they use that in the English language.

Hectic..

Well, I'm about to bable on and on, I warned you, this is soooo not gonna look pretty:

• If I had a million dollars, I'd give them all out!
• I need to fix my cell phone already!
• I got a bad case of Tru Calling addiction!!
• I luv the theme song of the OC! I always picture myself driving a convertible by the beach when I hear it!
• Everybody got issues, but knowing your issues, and handling them is a lot better than acting as if you're perfect.
• I'm in luv with that Superman song *dreamy*
• Girls are so much weirder than guys!
• I luv music! In another life time I would so be a musician!!
• I wana kill two Syrians ho got a Saudi national, whom I work with!!
• TV is my best friend, people are too weird for me.
• Blogging is the best therapy ever.
• I want to kill one Syrian guy I know :@
• I can be raciest, but only in stereotyping and making fun.
• I'm so feeling weird today! Don't ask me about this post.
• One of my friends told me to stop hating the Jews and only hate the Zionist, I couldn't =\
• I love kids! Being cute is always a plus :D
• I do love my country! What do you mean it’s not perfect? is anything “perfect” in this world!
• My annoying co-worker quit =D
• I'm actually worried of how hot it was this year in Europe.
• I'm learning to stop my Internet addiction.
• I met a cute Filipino who if I didn't meet at the hospital would so be my friend!
• I need to go to GYM again!
• I believe day after day that self education is more important than formal education.
• I got a crush on this 34 year old doctor who is totally clueless!
• If I didn't hear Simple Plan everyday, I would so think I'm alone..
• If Mad World was not written, I would've wrote it myself!!
• I want to change my job, just because I'm bored of seeing the same faces everyday!
• My annoying co worker quit! (Well, actually she’s been politely kicked out) the important thing is, she left, and people can breath again! I CAN BREATH AGAIN!
• I learned to become carefree.
• Did I mention that my annoying co-worker quit twice?? :P lol
• I should interview a blogger, but I really have no idea who!
• Bloggers meet up turned out to be rather cuter than I thought.
• I’m not sleeping as much as I used to before, this is something I wanted to achieve.
• Food became something disgusting to me for the first time since a long time!
• I miss a lot of old friends, and I am having a lot of memories of them lately..
• I'm so tired, got a constant headache, and quite frankly I don't think my intra laisak operation was a success =(
• I wish that some things that I didn't choose in this life, didn't define me! But it does to me as it does to others!
• I am discovering my friends more and more everyday, and some stuff still surprises me!
• Sam is in Dubai, I miss her already 8(
• I still don't have DSL, but guess what, one of my neighbours got wireless!! :D the signal ain't always strong, but hey, beggers can't be choosers!
• My Beach house saving account might get cashed out, near future looks uncertain 8(
• I leaned to know how to have fun with as little as I got.
• Sali from Star Ac gets on my nerves :S and I do miss Ahmed! After all, he was perfect :P
• I owe dad a huge apology 8(
• I am worried about mama's health, she doesn't look so hot lately! Allah yostor ya rab
• I miss my morning journeys with my sis.
• I will become skinny!

Over! I'm tired!!

Untitled

Is life treating you weird these days, do you feel left out when you see a lot of changes, and your friends are leaving.. Do you feel like you're too young to be living like this?? Or is it the other way around and you think you should be acting more mature!! Does everyone really know everyone and the world is small, or is it just that you look for connections to feel less like outsiders.. Why is everything reminding you of him? Why do you still see him everywhere, even hought it's been so long since it's over!!

I am in a place in my life where I look like I figured it all out, but really, I’m more confused than ever..

Fo0f finally meets the bloggers!!

So, this was really interesting, I postponed the meet for like 1 hr later, cuz of my mom -DUH- then, I had to change the time again, cuz mom changed hers -ANOTHER DUH-.

Note to self, I won't include myself in moms plans, even if she asks really nicely and try to get me feel guilty about not spending time with her!

Well, starting off, I have to say I'm bummed Noor and Balgees couldn't make it!! Ash too, but at least I had a one on one time with Ash before :D. Black Orchid and Bissa, too.. Hope all u guys gatherings were fun..

So, everyone who came today, it was my first time meet with!! And although there were the odd quite moments, but they were all cool and down to earth and oh, so nice and cute!! I actually told Farah that I didn't used to like her when I first started blogging, but she's just too nice, you can not not like her!! I wanted to prank the girls and after 3 seconds of me talking she confessed, I wanted to kick her in the balls, but sadly she didn't have any :Pp

Dibaz was really quite doing the cool act :Pp and you know what, that girl can pull off being a Brit so easy!! It turned me on so much, I actually asked her to talk in Arabic!!! Heh, and Taqo is such a shy chica, with a real calm voice that I can barely hear!! And guess what, she can pull off being Saudi!! -hey she even learned "meer" today!!-.. Doomy and Bella are just too cute!! They look like sisters!! Uber, well, I thought it would be awkward meeting you, since I never ever had any encounter with you, but she was reaaally a sweeetyyy, she came in such a short time, and she had a hot hair cut ;)

Summing up, I started the day with buying a heeled shoe, and ended it with buying a flat one -Doomy and Bella actually caught me there :$- so that gives you an idea that my day was really GOOD :D

Oh, yeah! And I saw Asala Nasry shopping for make up in Debenhams!! And guess what?? I AM SO FREGGIN' TALL NEXT TO HER!!! :D

Another note to self, check why BJ said she was coming?!

What is There to Have Fun "out" in Riyadh?

So, weekend, I had my reunion thingy today, mama had her own plans with her peeps. Dad was in bar, and my bros, well u know.. Surprisingly, my sisters had no where to go, and nothing to do!! I felt bad for them!! They really had nothing!!! What did they do, called STC and used ge6af(some kind of points STC gives out when using cell phones), more like abused ge6af, they called all the people they knew to chat!! Lol.

Oh yeah, I had a looot of fun at the reunion, I was amazed by what happened to my friends, I'm really happy for them! We agreed to do this more often =)

Life Goes On..

Once upon a time, there was a little girl. Living with her pink sweet looking family; mom, dad and sister and bro.. Her smile never left her, she loved to play, hey joy was when daddy gave her some time of his day. Daddy didn't do that a lot. After all he's all grown up, he was asthmatic, and she didn't want to hurt her daddy. He would play with others kids though, something she never understood. Now she grown, she still didn't get "Why wouldn't he play a lil with me."

As she got older, she saw him preach her, constantly telling her what's right and wrong.

Choosing her friends, her schooling, judging her hobbies, and her life!! He grew up to hate her, or so she felt, as he always thought the worst of her. Mommy was never there, she had her own place and own circle of life. She wouldn't care less of what happens inside her house, as long as it looked shiny and lunch was presented on time.

The little girl was no longer little, she got to learn a lot from life, although everyone stereotyped her as the spoiled one, everything she learnt was the hard way. She's all grown up now, should be all independent. But found herself in a place where she didn't feel she belonged, she always had a lot to accomplish in her mind, she always saw herself going places, she wanted a lot in life which she slowly but fiercely, realised she can't have.

Now, a young woman, she thinks, why bother dream, plan, or care, when my destiny is always under someone's hands. Whenever she wanted something, the irony of her reality hits her, telling her, although it is your life, but this is not your decision to make!

She still keeps walking, wipes her tears, and puts on her usual smile. Trying to go on.. Not really wanting to, but for the sake of her faith, for the love she has for her family, not knowing what she wants in life anymore, she still.. Goes on.

I'm Back, I'm Hyper :P and I am Better!!

Well.. I am back, Bahrain was.. Hmmm, well you know Bahrain, a couple of malls, sheesha cafes, movies, booze :P nothing special.. As always, just another family vacation~!

I seen a guy shitting by the highway, my baby bro and baby sis Ipods were stolen! I was moving around like a Vegas dealer, a deck of cards and an envelope filled with 100 Riyal bills totalling 5 grand!! WHAT?? You know my wallet and credit cards were stolen 3 weeks ago 8(

I was thinking on the long way back, what's the deal with girl friends?? Cant there be a real girl friend anymore?? Was there a9lan!! Why do people have to stereotype girls to be back stabbers and two faced liars.. Is it true cuz we ALL are!!! That's too bad, I hope it ain't true.. But I can see where all that is coming from more and more everyday!!

Still trying to get another job, I hate myself for being too picky and then,realising I need to move already!! Even if I didn't like the job, or the benefits were not as flashy as it should be.. I hate this feeling I'm getting lately, wanting to drop work, go back to uni.. live off mom and dad.. And just be a kid again 8(

Guess my glass looks half empty today..

Happy Valentines..

I am sick..

Home..

Hating my self!

I can't talk properly..

I can't walk properly..

And I cannot even BREATH properly!!

I'm sending the driver now to get my medications

(WHAT? I didn't think I was really sick till I woke up today!!)

What a happy valentines this turned out to be!

Pray for my health people, as I feel like I'm dying 8(

Weekends Weekends..

So.. My Ipod mini is officially full now, I need to take some real thought in selecting the music I'll keep and the music I'll delete.. I am not ready to buy a new Ipod yet..

Yesterday I did not go out anywhere.. I was in pain, and someone was supposed to be there for me!! You always say I am your best friend, but you sure ain't mine..

So, I been in my lovely room for what seems like forever this weekend, as my lovely family made me casa into everyones su casa, I couldn't be free in my own home. I am usually an outgoing person and can mingle with anyone, but yesterday, I didn't want to see anyone, and our lovely guest slept over. (I don't know when exactly, the house was up all night).

My plan was to go to work this weekend too, but I didn't wake up! 8( I'll just go on Sat a tad early so I finish up what I got to finish.. Nothing productive ever happens on Sat, everyone else is off! I am proposing a new weekend for our department in the weekly meet. Hope it all goes well.

~Enjoy ur weekends everyone ;)

My Name is Fo0f and I am Suspicious-ic.

OK. This is gonna be weird, -For me, not for you!!- Being a suspicious person, I always thought I had a good thing going on for me here. As it is never bad to be suspicious, it makes you think about the situation, and analyze it and always gets you a logical explanation given the variables you have. Or at least that's what I thought for my last 22 years.

My suspicious behavior always got me to solve a lot of problems and always made me think wisely before I con somebody - as a prank of course!! Or parents, dauh!- I always enjoyed it. I don't say it was always right but I don't go on accusing people and that's what kept me on the safe side always, you are a liar, and I know, but you don't know I know. And we can both co exist, me knowing how your mind thinks, and you thinking I'm too dumb to get what your trying to pull.

So the other day at work, I been getting the weirdest calls, someone's been calling me and hanging up, and I'm used to that from my annoying co worker, she wants to know if I'm there, or she just wants to annoy me. The stupid thing is, I can hear her punching my numbers, and hanging up!! We're two cubicles away for God's sake!!!

So this was going on for a while, then my cell phone, missed calls from a “sawa” number. I was like OK. What does she want to do now =\ and I was in the middle of a discussion with a colleague and it did annoy me!! So I told him, please call this number!! I wanted to bust her and make her feel stupid, so he called. And it was the breakfast I ordered for the department, the guy bringing it was lost!!! TALK ABOUT A FLUSHED FO0F FACE!!

Good thing I didn't tell my colleague about my so-bright-conclusion!!! I would've been so embarrassed!!

~Fo0f, over and out.

I'm Happy :D well, at least before Umee called!! Jk ;)

I CAN BLOG!!!
At last a google account!! Damn, these guys are getting richer everyday!!

Today started out like any other winter in Riyadh working day. Hardly can wake up, brush my teeth with my eyes shut and try to leave home early to reach work on time.

But today, I have heard this "AMAZING" news.. and I'm high all day :D it's impossible to think this could still make me happy but it did, what kills me is, it's confidential!! I wanted to put on a Circular!! Almohm I'm HAPPY :D

Oh, yeah, and I got a brand new cubicle!! And planning to get a sound system for my room (maybe these too, got something to do with my happiness, just maybe)

So anyways, as "certain" ex-bloggers - yeah, you know urselves =P- enjoy facebook too much.. I look back and think.. What would I miss if I left too..

I remember first blog I had, on multiply.. Then Alyana told me about her blog, and then Nora.. and I was like wow, that has a million more options, and I joined, I didn't tell either of them, cuz I wanted to blog for me.. But they found out cuz the Saudi blogger community was too small then, I miss their blogs, I miss lotsa people who used to blog..

Only 3 of my friends know about my blog. I don't really want people to know.. And sometimes I think more and more people know.. But did that make me change my mind about having a blog.. I always liked to write down my feelings, papers, sms, email.. I used to -and might still do- have a problem in speaking about my feelings.. When I'm hurt, I cry. When I feel misjudged, I cry.. When I'm accused of something I didn't do, I cry!!!! I can be my own ball of emotional trauma!! And I luv my own time alone, my Fo0f-time..

Sometimes you call, I hear the phone, I'm not really busy with anything, but I choose not to pick up, sometimes I agree to a meet and cancel and make up a reason, just because I felt chocked.. Wanted some air, needed my own time. Or needed a break from you.. I never judged people's behaviour which I don't approve of.. So I think they should cut me some slack and let me be, without being judged, or blamed..

So anyways, this writing thing have always helped me through out the years, it's always been a kind of therapy that I have made out to solve my own problems.. I am in love with it now, I can't leave it, I owe it too much.. And I don't thin I can live with out it, I don't want to be a great writer.. I just want to "be".. And write.. And continue to write.. For me =)

Week-ends not so Exciting Anymore?

I just can't get over the fact that my in tray has too much paper, I got a million pending cases that need follow ups and I didn't do my quarterly report yet!! What's wrong with me!! I really can't get over leaving work like this.. I seriously want to go to work tomorrow!!

~LOL, so I hear facebook is the new blogspot ;)

Fo0f Kids .. :3

It's a girls year!! All the babies are cuttttee girls this year!!

My friend is about to have a baby, when she knew it was a girl, she started panicking to think of a name.. I didn't know it was this hard, till I tried to help her.. I never even thought of what would I name my own kids!! I want my kids to have cute names.. But when a cute name is named everyone steals it!! Like Rand!! Everyone's a Rand now!! Or Leen/Layan!! And I so wanted a baby Talal but my cousin names her baby Talal so now I need new ideas!!

I was at Rima'z blog -where I can not comment- and read this recent post also about having babies and naming them.. I liked Jana... But obviously it's gonna be a lot, and I don't want to steal it from Rima =P

So.. As you can see, I been thinking of my own babies names.. I got some prospective now.. But guess what, I am afraid to share them with people now, so they won't use em before I do!!

Call me selfish.. It's a tough world! And do share if you got cute names in mind :P

Note(s) to Self

I had a nice weekend.. I lost my wallet!! I am IDless and Cardless!! You feel like you lost yourself for a while, but now I cancelled my cards I'm ok, it's time to buy a new wallet anyways!! -LOL, moi's doing a great job taking it easy, don't ya think ;)-

I saw friends, family.. I went out and partied, fought with mama (something odd if it didn't happen).. Met someone really sweet and interesting.. I got some notes, pls this is for my documentation.. If you don't like it then =P

• Learn how to dance in a mini skirt! -it's surprisingly hard!-
• Be always ready for change.
• Don't take my baby sis to any of my gatherings!!
• Don't call someone who smsed just cuz I lost their number and wana know who they are :$

that's it for now.. Weekend over, back to work.. I'll watch some more One Tree Hill.. Then off to bed..

I Find It Hard To Say (Rebel)

Ok, yeah, alright...

I find it hard to say, that everything is alright
Don't look at me that way, like everything is alright
Cuz my own eyes can see, through all your false pretenses
But what you fail to see, is all the consequences
You think our lives are cheap, and easy to be wasted
As history repeats, so foul you can taste it
And while the people sleep, too comfortable to face it
His life so incomplete, and nothing can replace it
Fret not thyself I say, against these laws of man
Cuz like the Bible says, His blood is on their hands
And what I gotta say, and what I gotta say, is rebel
While today is still today, choose well
And what I gotta say, is rebel, it can't go down this way
Choose well, choose well, choose well......choose well, choose well, choose well
And while the people sleep, too comfortable to face it
Your lives are so incomplete, and nothing, and no one, can replace it
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no
And what I gotta say, and what I gotta say
And what I gotta say, and what I gotta say
And what I gotta say, and what I gotta say
And what I gotta say, and what I gotta sayIs rebel... rebel, rebel, rebel, rebel, rebel, rebel
Rebel, rebel, rebel, rebel, rebel
Repent, the day is far too spent, rebel... rebel!
Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up...
Wake up and rebel
We must destroy in order to rebuild
Wake up, you might as well
Oh are you... oh are you satisfied
Oh are you satisfied
Rebel... ohhh rebel
Why don't you rebel, why don't you rebel?
Why don't you rebel?
I'm fading myself down now...

Bad Day!

15 Jan 07'

bad day.. Weird day.. The problem is, it will effect other days.. God, please, get me justice! And get the hypocrite a hell on earth! Amen

I got a huge headache!!! Off..

MY New Years Resolutions

I do have new years resolutions after all. I hope I can remember them, I wana post 'em here so I can keep track.. They were 8~9 I guess..

1. To loosen up, not take a lot of stuff seriously
2. Become less sensitive
3. Reach that certain weight I want
4. Save a certain amount of money
5. Be honest about my feelings
6. If a thing takes only one minute to do, do it right away
7. Complete my higher education
8. Try to convince my parents that they worry too much
9. Say I luv you, more often
   

Okay I cant remember if this is it, or is something missing, if I do remember, I'll update and pin this post somewhere..

~Updated, thanks Umeee ;)

As Always.. I've Got a Lot to Say..

Helooooo!!

First off, I'd like to say, if you missed me, blame blogger (and it's stupid upgrades!!), if not; blame yourselves =P

I was watching this special about this girl who got fired, cuz her employer found out about her blog!!!! Then, the very next day, I see my own blog being circulated in the internal employees emails! So, I got pretty crept out.. It's not like I tell Company secrets, but still, the attention made me unfomfy.. Then again it's my blog, and I will keep on saying what I want in it.

It's been over a month on my op, and I think that the doctor will make me go again, I still can't see clearly.. I had a dream about it, a real good looking doctor was operating.. I have to remember..

I am watching One Tree Hill lately, and Paden is really getting on my nerves.. I never met someone like that, but if I did, I might go ahead and kill her =\, Lucas on the other hand, is too good!! (at least so far) I mean, where I come from, kids who are not so fortunate to have good schooling and family bonds, turn out to be the worst..

Weekend, a friend I used to like woke me up, she was asking me why I dont call her and meet her no more, @10 IN THE MORNING!! AND CLEARLY SHE WAS TALKING TO ME WHILE SLEEPING!!! I didnt want to hurt her feelings by saying something stupid cuz of the sleep effect.. So I told her I'd call her back when I wake up..

This girl, told me something 3 weeks ago, that made me think so much less of her, I am trying not to judge, but lets say her view on some things made me think less of her and not like her.. I hate people who dont think like me.. I am too found with the way I think.. I know I aint perfect, but at least I'd like to be around the people who "think" not look, like me..

2007

Just when I thought this year is gonna be hard to be a good year for me, it started out with something I never thought would happen! Hope it continues at this pace!
Ps. I have to fix my old cell or get a new one, ASAP!

How Was ur Break?

Right now, I feel like meeting friends. And my family feels like seeing relatives, and since I am not the "decision maker" in this house, I had to put up with what they wanted to do, and accept that I am not going out, just because going out to meet friends while they meet relatives is a big taboo -at least in their heads- I don't want to even get started on how people think in my family. I don't say I think perfectly, nor that I am a family person, I see my grandparents, aunts and uncles once a month at least. And I think that is more than enough for someone who works 10 hrs a day, 5 days a week and has lotsa friends she rarely sees.

I don't know why I don't feel as bummed as before, I think it has to do with a convo I had yesterday with a friend (she was online, I didn’t see her!) She told me I was too sensitive and that made some people afraid of getting close to me, and that I get hurt easily. I think that got me thinking, of course after I rained her with her insecurities as pay back =P don’t worry, we love each other.

I discovered a new thing about me - it is amusing that you still "learn" things about yourself-. A convo like the one I had with my friend, really sinks in, gets me deep. See I take what people say most of the time seriously, yesterday, it did me a lot of good. And I am grateful to her.

On another note, Abdul from work sent me a happy new year SMS!! That guy hates me!! Lol, what's happening to this world??! Plus, I thought he was kinda.. Mutawa'a? =P lol, guess looks (and behaviour) are deceiving..

I don't have new year resolutions, it's the same old 22nd birthday wishes, I just thought, now I got 4 months only to get them all done, so I better step up on those goals, may God help me, and bless the ones I luv. Amen

~Fo0f